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It's been a rough two weeks.
Sorry I didn't get an entry in last week. Needed some “me” time.
Really the only thing to comment on for the previous week, is I had my two temp crowns put on, and it went very smoothly. No dramas and very little discomfort. I did have one small incident when I sneezed and the temp crowns shot across the kitchen floor. I'm not exaggerating! It was like 1am in the morning. I was building a new computer for the office and I needed it done the next day. Achooooo..and they shot out. I had to scrape the old cement out, mix new cement, and try to figure out what direction they went in. ~shudder~
Anyway, it's mid-morning on Monday, and my brain is very foggy. I haven't been sleeping the last couple nights, and stressed out so much I got a giant crick in my shoulder/neck. I took a Xanax so I could sleep last night. I did, but woke up with my brain racing through a bunch of fog.
It's funny how my body re-acts to REAL stress. It totally revolts on me. My hunger drops, I want to hurl all the time. It's a very good diet plan! I should do it more often.
I just ate half of a banana- progress!
What brought all this on? Well, I decided to quit my job of 15 years. Something hit me just wrong, and I snapped. I did wait and wait on it, so it wouldn't be a rash decision, but it was pretty quick.
I don't think I have NOT had a job since I was 15. Sure the site is a full-time job, but there are no guarantees of a steady income, insurance, all those things that give me a solid foundation. Will try to pickup some design work, and really concentrate on membership and photography.
You all have to help out!
Of course all this happens when I am in spending mode on new models this weekend.
Robert San Roman (fellow Austin photographer) and I went halfsies on a ticket to have January '04 model Alex fly down for a shoot. I would work with him on Saturday, and Robert would on Sunday.
So while all this was going on, I went over Friday night and picked Alex up from the airport. I'm driving along thinking “Geezuz this car drinks gas, I can't be driving out to the airport. I really have to watch my driving time.” I hate suddenly having to worry if I can afford to fill my gas tank up.
Alex looked like everyone's dream Abercrombie and Fitch - Fratboy type as he came down the escalators to the baggage claim. His flight was late, even though the monitors said it was on time, so I worried that he didn't make the flight or I somehow missed him. Sure enough he eventually descended the escalator like someone's wet dream.
Alex is a very shy guy. You'd think as handsome and as fit as he is, he might be cocky, but he blushes non-stop, and is very quiet...except when he is talking to his boyfriend Steve on the phone. They talked 3-4 times on Saturday, for lengthy periods, despite dating for two-years.
I might have seen dozens of guys at the airport waiting with flowers for their girlfriends, but
nothing seemed quite so romantic to me as the two of them chatting on the phone together. Not sure why that was, but there ya have it.
Last weekend I had gone out to Barbara's land and painted her abandoned chicken coop door red. She also had some abandoned and run down barns that would make terrific photo settings.
As it turned out, this Saturday we actually got snow! Not a lot, but the weather was definitely cold and blustery. It was 35 degrees, and I kept Alex wrapped in a blanket. We'd shoot 3-4 photos, and then he would bundle up again. He never complained once, eager to get the best shot possible.
I felt guilty for making him freeze, so we ended the shot early, but got some amazing images.
After the shoot, we just had to go and meet the flying foxes that Babara cares for.
Faith and her female friend Kris came over and took us out to dinner for Valentine's Day. They brought each of us a flower and a card. We are all single, well, except Alex, but his bf was in Colorado, so he counted as being single on Valentine's Day also.
The girls wanted sushi, so we went to a place nearby. Took off our shoes (I hate that!) sat down, and realized they had a special VD menu that was a $26 a plate dinner. I don't even eat fish, and paying that much for uncooked fish slapped on a plate was NOT gonna happen. Plus I was payin' for Alex's meal and the $55 dinner was not in this newly unemployed boy's budget.
Thankfully I didn't feel like a cheap basturd, cuz everyone was like "No way, we're out of here!"
So we did the "Tie your shoes back on in shame and flee the restaurant" thing and went to the most unromantic place we could think of- Kerbey Lane Cafe. It wasn't busy at all, and there wasn't any outrageously overpriced dishes.
Faith and Kris were on a roll and had Alex and I laughing till tears were coming out of our eyes. It was a very nice dinner.
They dropped of us off, and Alex and I watched a video or two. We both dozed off, and we woke up with Alex hungry again (He eats ALOT!) and I wandered off to bed while Alex called Steve for one last conversation for the night.
Alex woke up at 8am all refreshed and handsome, while I had only slept about an hour, tossing and turning, fretting about how I was gonna pay mortgage, bills, car payments. Plus I got a major crick in my neck from stressing out, so had that keeping me awake too. NOT a goodnight, fear creeping into every thought.
Robert San Roman arrived at 9am to collect Alex and shoot with him all day, then drop him at the airport. First thing Robert said, was.."Honey you look like shit" We giggled and I hurried them out the door so I could grab another hour of sleep.
I had a photoshoot with two other models on Sunday, but it was pretty much a disaster.
After that, Tony called and we went over to CompUSA to get a wireless router so he could setup a small network at his house. We did the install, and I struggled with one computer that just would not accept the drivers for the wireless card. I finally gave up and we just hard wired it in.
I did get his wireless network installed, working and encrypted, and it does work cuz my laptop connected right away, but that dang Compaq computer just wouldn't recognize the wireless card.
Tony offered to work the crick out of my shoulder and neck, and that's the first time he has worked on me. He took about 30 minutes on super awesome kneading and he had a lot of it worked out. I took some Advil (or something ur supposed to take for muscle thingys) and sure enough its all but worked out. In less then 24 hours! Usually it's a three day thing (I know you all get those cricks..where you can't turn ur head one direction for three days)
Sunday night I was determined to sleep. So I took a Xanax. Yeah yeah yeah, I'm an addict. I normally would only take one when I fly, but my heads been spinning non-stop on this. I slept pretty solidly, but woke up with everything racing through my head again, but like I said, all foggy like.
Anyway, better get his uploaded, or you all will think I have abandoned you two weeks in a row.
Wish me luck. And be sure to send work, members, karma…anything my way! Gonna need it!
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